Talk of A Lifetime
The Funeral and Memorial Information Council (FAMIC) created Have the Talk of a Lifetime to help families have important conversations about the things that matter most to them and how a person’s life story can be remembered and honored in a meaningful way. Memorialization is so much more than it used to be. Today it can reflect a person’s life story, values, interests and experiences. Meaningful memorialization can be transformative, healing and comforting. Have the Talk of a Lifetime offers families practical advice and tools to help them have conversations about the things that matter most and how they hope to be remembered when they die and for generations to come.
Why is having the Talk important?
Deep down, many of us want to know that we have made a difference in this world. Having the Talk of a Lifetime can help achieve that by bringing us closer to our loved ones. Sitting down to discuss their lives, memorable events, important people, favorite activities, values, and lessons learned can be incredibly enriching and satisfying. This conversation helps us reconnect and appreciate the impact our loved ones have had on our lives, reaffirming their significance and the difference they have made.
Who should Have the Talk?
You can have the Talk of a Lifetime with anyone you hold dear—parents, children, grandparents, aunts and uncles, a spouse, or a friend. This meaningful conversation can happen wherever you and your loved one feel most comfortable: over a meal, at home, on a walk, at a family gathering, or while playing a game. It's a conversation that can take place at any time, not just at the end of life.
How do I start the Talk?
Using a visual prompt, such as a photo album, souvenir, or memento, can be a great way to start a meaningful conversation. Memorable places, like the church where your loved one was married or a favorite park, can also encourage someone to share their story.
You might begin by sharing a cherished memory of a vacation you took together, a piece of advice you treasure, a song that reminds you of them, or the reasons you will never forget them. Consider taking notes during or after your conversation, or making an audio recording. Choose the method that feels most appropriate and comfortable for your setting.
Some questions you could ask to start the talk are:
- What is your proudest achievement?
- What was the one piece of advice you received from your parents or grandparents that you never forgot?
- Tell me about the most memorable summer you had growing up.
- Tell me about your favorite teacher; what did you learn from him or her?
- If you could spend a day doing anything you like, what would it be?
- Who has been your greatest inspiration?
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